"I never thought I'd die alone,another six months I'll be unknown. Give all my things to all my friends, you'll never step foot in my room again. You'll close it off, board it up, remember the time that I spilled the cup of apple juice in the hall? Please tell mum this is not her fault."

At the moment I'm listening to "Adam's Song - Blink 182".
Today was kind of a nice day. I went to the beach with my mates to celebrate 'Australia Day'. However, my amazingly fun day was completely ruined by seeing my ex boyfriend. I saw him and some of his mates walk past me as I was on the beach. This is the same person whose final words to me were "I pretended to love you the whole time" and "You need to do something about your weight issue". He is looking really thin and muscly at the moment. Wow, you probably have no idea how jealous I feel. As of now, I am not eating until I feel like I'm going to be sick. And this will stay as rule for me until I get thin. I never thought i'd resort to this option ever again. But I just feel completely fat.

I have two options:

• Commit suicide.
• Stop eatting until I get thin.

I will try with the second option for now. Although, the meaning of the song I am listening to at the moment is really getting me curious to see if there is anything better on the other side.

Goodnight.